chocolate cake with a dash of vanilla ice-cream. yum.

argh shit. my vow to abstain from chocolate was once again broken for the 100000000th time. but it was sooo yummy i felt like taking a photo of it before eating it. i almost didnt feel like stabbing my fork in it to actually tear it apart in sticky little sin-nishly cute blobs and masticate (learnt this word while doing vocab exercises for GP. so fun.) it in my mouth. Almost.

Oh well. Im already so mentally anguished this isnt really going to affect me much i guess =|. I dunno whether to feel happy or sad about that...hmm.

Ok this post is a bit screwy coz i didnt have enough time to finish it..so the 1st 2 paras are yesterday's and everything else is today's. Lol. I'm not exactly sure why this is important.....-.-

Anw. So school is kind of looking up. I mean apart from my class. We haven't really bonded much..i mean my class and me. They've bonded btw themselves i guess but the only times (so far) that i have fun with them are during the times i play bridge. Oh well. I'm getting used to going to lessons with my class and skipping away to eat lunch with SH's class. And then playing bridge during our class free periods when i should be diligently studying.

Ok. so now since i have reminded myself about studying..i shall rant about it a bit more so u, my dear readers, can get a clearer picture concerning my trauma and mental anguish.

I NEED HELP. SERIOUS HELP. I DONT KNOW WHAT THE HELL THEY'RE TALKING ABOUT IN MATHS AND THATS MY FAVOURITE SUBJECT. AND PHYSICS IS JUST BEYOND ME DUE TO MY TUTOR AND LECTURER MAKING THE SAME AMT OF SENSE..WHICH IS NONE IN THE 1ST PLACE. OH AND HAVE I MENTIONED CHEMISTRY?? A SUBJECT IN WHICH I DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT SHE'S TALKING ABOUT HALF THE TIME?? AND OF COURSE ECONS. WHICH IS JUST BEYOND ME. I CANT EVEN DO THE FRIGGING TUTORIALS WITHOUT REFERRING TO MY LECTURE NOTES. I MIGHT AS WELL GO AND JOIN ITE OR A SPECIAL SCHOOL FOR THE MENTALLY DISABLED OR SOMETHING.

ok im done with my rant.

but u know..ranting online isnt as satisfying as actually complaining to a real live person. coz it doesnt respond u know..and half the time ppl who tag don't even talk about what i post so i cant like discuss it. and in school, since im a nice person, i cant just go up to a random person and rant at him/her or start snapping at everyone in class or yelling myself hoarse in the canteen or sth. coz normal happy people dont do that. and i would so like to be normal and happy.

or at least thought of by others as normal and happy. =|

oh and he is ignoring me =| (sad face). and he likes someone else. a few other someones in fact. and its so discouraging going to a school filled with thin (not fat) and good-looking girls. oh well.

oh one more thing. i really dont know what i would do if SH wasnt there. or if sherinah wasnt there. or if chitra wasnt there. or if everyone i am close to outside my class wasnt there. thanks u guys.

haha its like im writing my farewell message. =|

i am full of pent-up frustration.

everytime i try to step into the computer room to have a little privacy (which seems unattainable in this house) so that i can actually blog somebody comes in and says: Ahalya! Come and see this! (from ashwin/shilpa)..or Ahalya! Come eat your food! (from my mum) or..Ahalya! Let's do Economics! (from my dad..who for some reason is very excited that i am doing economics. His excitement has not abated over the last 3 months. I wonder when it will.)

Lol. My home life is so entertaining. Ok well. Not really. More like weird and crazy and disorganised and noisy and irritating.

But its a whole lot of fun compared to my school life. Which apart from some occasional perks is completely DEVOID of fun. The only moments of fun come from during lunch/common breaks/at the grandstand b4 school/gp lessons/trips to the bookshop when I'm sitting around and crapping with SH and her classmates or brief glimpses of you-know-who or bitching/gossiping with cricket mates. Oh and also when i play bridge with my class ppl.

But other than all that stuff its very very very very monotonous, dull and boring.

Lessons suck.

Summation Sucks (or maybe this is because i sat down to do the summation tutorial wksht this afternoon..and DID NOT EVEN GET 1 QUESTION RIGHT)

Chemistry Sucks.

Everything Sucks.

Lecturers Suck (majorly..esp chem. Though i manage to keep myself awake by watching the lecturer's mouth moving..it contorts into weird shapes.)

Have i mentioned everything sucks?

I dunno. Ever since after Orientation 2 (ogls rock! haha..had so much fun @ dance party!! Saw Priya..who refused to dance. I was the one dancing like a maniac when i can't even dance properly in the 1st place. Bet her friends thought i was nuts. Why do ppl always get the 1st impression that im nuts?) ended school life has taken a definite downturn.

Plus my morale is in the dumps coz i learnt somemore about you-know-who's feelings towards others. =| I am such a slave to my lust. OK. maybe not lust. Just err...hormones. Or sth. NOT LUST.

Ok so right now the only thing i like about my life is my blog template. Its so cute =).

Oh and cricket as well coz the team really rocks and all of us feel the same way about the guys' ridiculous behaviour. Why do they hate us so much? =(

Ok i have to go and eat now. Oh that reminds me I have to stop eating chocolate again. Im putting on weight =(. Why can't I have a high metabolic rate that will allow me to have a diet of roti prata everyday???? WHY?